Feeling Stuck: Fueling That Fire

I feel like I am having writers block. Theres a lot of thoughts in my brain but none of them are forming into words. I would say I get like this probably once a month, I just get stuck. I am feeling pretty empty these days and it isn’t as depressing as it sounds. I feel empty within myself, like I should be taking the opportunity to do more for myself you know? I believe I have so much potential that could be used for the greater and I’m just not really doing it or using it. I need something to fill my cup that isn’t cabernet sauvignon. I love to write and it feels weird to be going for a profession where those talents won’t be expressed. I am so excited to go into the healthcare system, but it lacks creativity. I used to write for an online platform where I had a set scheduled post per week, but then I entered college and I wasn’t of age to do so anymore.

I have always been a literature person, I used to make Powerpoints for my parents explaining why I should get a dog or short stories of my magical friends and I taking adventures across the globe. I had won poetry contests and short story contests too and had always been loved by my English teachers. But where did that spark go? This post wasn’t even going to be directed toward my decline in the writing aspect, but this is what its turning into and hey, content is content!

I had always wanted to be a journalist, but found it a dying field. My dream was to end up as a crime reporter / forensic scientist / Law and Order SVU aficionado. But I knew I had a passion for people, and I was always good at science, so that was where I turned. I have turned toward God so much in this time period, and I am not trying to tell you that is what you should do, but sometimes giving it up to something higher than yourself is comforting and empowering.

Long story short, I have this fire inside of me that’s a little wee flickering flame and I need it to be engulfing my soul once again. So I am going to list some challenges for myself this June / summer altogether and hopefully broadcasting this onto the internet will help me stick to it.

  • Read at least 2 books a month . (The paper kind, not the online, fan fic type nonsense)
  • Write more poetry
  • Take a journal with me everywhere
  • Brain dump every morning (brain dumping for those of you who do not know is is a complete transfer of accessible knowledge about a particular subject from your brain to some other storage medium, such as paper or your computer’s hard drive) https://whatis.techtarget.com/definition/brain-dump
  • Write without constraint and without fear of judgement.
  • Exercise!!!!
  • Eat things that are not a burrito

These may seem like silly things, but honestly my mental health has been slipping and I can’t keep getting tattoos to fix that! I hope that my literally brain dump of a rant inspires some of you to go after that dream you’ve always wanted, that flame in your belly. Even if it means a change of heart or change or direction, stick with it. Writing was going to be my job, so was video production (that’s another story), but my heart took me towards healthcare. Stop putting the pressure on yourself to do the best you can so quickly! I literally have laid in bed the last 3 days feeling like garbage for me to finally realize what the heck I was doing to myself.

You are all perfect beings and on the road to being your best self, no matter how long its taking you! So stay tuned to these more rant type posts and my more personal spiel.

 

Let me know if you have any other non-braindumpy ideas for my blog,

xx,

G

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Japanese Cherry Blossom Festival

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This weekend I decided to embrace my hobby more and take some pictures at a local festival.

In this blog post I figured I would show you guys some of the pictures I took and a little bit about them. I haven’t posted in a while, and there is a reason. Recently, everything in life social media wise has felt rather forced. I don’t like the idea that things are fabricated or look unauthentic. I have taken some steps to reduce this by leaving engagement groups and only following content that makes me happy. (This included unfollowing girls that made me feel insecure with no offense to them! Keep rocking it ladies, it’s just a hard time for me) I have learned to make my instagram and my social scene a happy place, not a place that causes me insecurity or stress. I constantly felt myself comparing and judging myself based on numbers and looks. I encourage all of you to do a “cleanse” in the next few weeks, and to make social media more genuine for you.

So furthermore, here are some of my pictures from my weekend.

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I have been trying to focus most of my photography on portraits, because I love people. I think a photo can capture so many different things and emotions. My favorite thing is shooting people who are uncomfortable with having pictures taken of themselves. I love to make them laugh to create a genuine image.

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Nature is another thing I love to photograph. I love to capture the natural colors and light that the world gives us.

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This clock was one of my favorite things at the festival. It was in the museum of history that I didn’t even know we had!

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This clock was insanely cool. It was over 100 years old and parades every 30 minutes. When the hour hits, the twelve disciples come out from the back and bow their heads to the Jesus figurine in the front. All the disciples, that is, but Paul. Paul turns his back to Jesus, a foreshadowing of his future sin.

For all of you who know anything about me, the clock also features a moon dial and a sun dial. The length of daylight is told in the sun dial and the type of moon is told in the moon dial.

I wish I could have this in my house I swear.

https://buffalohistorymuseum.com/2016/11/05/the-apostolic-clock-and-its-many-mysteries/ 

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If you are interested in more about this clock you can read it here.

Of course it wouldn’t be Buffalo, if I didn’t mention the architecture and the Buffalo Bills.

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Photography has always been a passion of mine and I never gave myself the time of day to pursue it. My mom gifted me the camera I’ve always wanted for my 21st birthday and I can’t wait to learn more about it.

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I hope that this post gives you a little more personal insight to my life and what I love to do. I encourage all of you to follow your passions if you possess one, don’t let it intimidate you.

As always, keep your faith and keep your smile.

xx,

G

“Why else are we here if not to live with unreasonable passion for things” – butterflies rising

the tea: on thrifting

so, it is time for the tea.

thrifting; do you do it?

well you should and in this blog post i am going to be dishing out the tips and tricks i use when going thrifting as well as showing you my recent finds.

so, my #1 tip for thrifting is to go unplanned. don’t go into thrifting looking for a certain piece or outfit because you will tear your hair out trying to find it.

today, i went thrifting completely randomly and found more items than i really ever have. i didn’t go looking for a certain piece or even color really, i just went in looking!

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so to start off the shopping trip, i found my go-to fashion item; t-shirts.

i tend to go to the tshirt section to look for oversized shirts to wear or shirts i can cut into crops. my style is generally more laid back and i wear a lot of crops and oversized shirts in the spring time.

all of these shirts were around $2-3 each and i was very happy with what i found.

next, the jackets.

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although winter came to a close, i still wanted to check the jacket section for my next favorite fashion item – windbreakers.

i found these two for $6 each and i am suppppper exctied about them. i actually bought the wilson tennis jacket for my friend who plays tennis. i was sad to see it go, but i have a million jackets, i could spare this one.

the red jacket caught my eye and took me out of my comfort zone. red is NOT my color, but this jacket was super cute and comfy on.

so tip #2 is to go out of your comfort zone! try different styles, colors, and sizes, and SECTIONS. most of the clothes i thrift come from the men’s section. dont be afraid to try things out.

Processed with VSCO with hb1 presetProcessed with VSCO with hb1 presetnext, i headed to the blouses and picked up these two cute shirts for $3 each. one of them was NastyGal. NASTYGAL. ladies!!!!! thrit!!!!

the black shirt was hard to capture in a picture but it has a tie in the front and is cropped and is super stylish and cute. the yellow shirt is my favorite color and perfect for spring time.

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these next two i caught last minute. the white top is so feminine and petite i was super happy to come across it. paired with a white bralette and a skirt is a perfect sheek spring outfit. the striped top was more my style and the buttons were such a cute add on.

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the pants section!!!

i got 3 pairs of insanely cute pants. the first pair on the left is from j.crew and were a stretchy denim fit with a tie that scrunch at the bottom. the middle pair reminded me a lot of a pair i had from forever 21 and were super cute and retro. the black pants were stretchy black jeans that somehow i had none of?

total: $8.

tip #3 would be to try the clothes on if you can. this day, i didnt have the proper clothing on to try on my items, and honestly i was not in the mood so i just opted out of my own tip. but to confirm your purchase, try it on!

my last place i check in the thrift store is the book section.

and boy, did i hit a jackpot.

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so not only was the deal buy 4 books get one free, i found all of the books that were on my Amazon wishlist for more than 50 percent off.

these books were THREE DOLLARS EACH PEOPLE. and i got one free.

incredible.

(if you want a book review on any of these, please lmk)

so ladies and gentleman, those are my 3 thrifting tips.

thrifting is so cheap and beneficial to the environment as well as helping out people and charities in need.

go in with an open mind, and getcho thrift on.

I shall go into the thrift store just to look, sure... thats what they all say. Next thing ya know your buying a ton of stuff XD

x,

g

the tea: on blue light glasses

Photo on 3-13-19 at 9.33 PM.jpgthe tea on blue light glasses . do they work ?!

This has been a VERY requested post on the blog so I decided to dive into it.

I had heard about blue light glasses from multiple instagram influencers and commercials and really didn’t believe the whole “hype”. I have suffered from migraines since high school and looking at a computer screen and my phone screen has caused insane strain on my eyes and multiple headaches.

I had tried everything to fix my migraines. Sumatriptan, no coffee, coffee, physical therapy, etc. Things seemed to help temporarily but I still had constant migraines, especially in the hospital during clinical rotations.

So, I decided to give blue light glasses a try.

But what is blue light?

Now that you have a little more education on what blue light is, the glasses work to block out the light coming through from your tablet, computer, etc. The lights have a tinted frame that makes everything yellow when you wear them.

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You can kind of see the yellow hue in this picture here.

“Bue light glasses are designed to filter out 55 percent of the 474-475 range of blue light that is emitted from digital devices. Blue light blocking glasses are effective at blocking out harmful light. Some blue light is necessary for our health because it helps keep us alert and aware during daylight hours.”

– https://www.eagleeyes.com/blogs/news/how-blue-light-blocking-glasses-protect-vision

Blue light also forces our body to stay awake. So, when you are on your phone or computer late at night the blue light is convincing your body that you should be staying awake and makes it a lot harder to fall asleep. Exposure to blue light has been proven to reduce melatonin production at night.

Sleep was a major difference I saw in the effects of blue light glasses. I had such trouble falling asleep in general and would be on my computer into the late night for school, youtube, etc. Once I started wearing these glasses, I found myself able to fall asleep a lot easier.

Not only do I wear my blue light glasses at night on my computer, I also wear them in the hospital. The bright lights in the hospital caused intense eye strain and were a major trigger for my migraines and had even caused me to go home sick with a crippling aura filled migraine. Not to mention frustrating, but embarrassing.

I have been wearing my blue light glasses for a little over 2 months and have noticed an insane difference. I can fall asleep easier and quicker, I haven’t had light-induced migraines, my eyes don’t feel strained and I am able to get through an entire shift of clinical.

Whether it be the technology of blue light blocking or a placebo, I don’t care. These things have worked WONDERS for me and I will continue to wear them until they break.

The best part is I literally got them on amazon for $16, and they’re cute. IMG_8077.jpg

If you are interested in my blue light glasses you can find them here.

If you guys have any questions or want the “tea” on another specific product be sure to let me know via email or in the comments below.

As always, have a fabulous day.

xx,

G

Reflection on the First Quarter: Jan, Feb, March

 

Photo on 3-7-19 at 4.17 PM #3So, it is March, and I haven’t blogged since January.

Yikes.

These few couples months of the year have been actually amazing. It blows my mind how much change I have gone through since this time last year and seeing myself progress is so exciting. I am growing into the woman I want to be and this makes me want to scream with joy.

I have found so much love these past few months, within myself, my passions and within pursuing God.

I decided to take this time to reflect on the first “quarter” of this year and fill ya’ll in with where I have been.

January was pretty busy, full of schedule changes and goals that I never pursued. I went to the gym pretty regularly and was getting excited with my progress, but as I usually do, I gave up. I am quite disappointed in my lack of motivation to stay healthy and workout, but I plan on working on that. I got denied my dream job, I lost connections with a lot of people, but I made even more.

February was my favorite month, because it is my birthday month. I turned the big 21! I had a lot of fun with my friends and made even more genuine connections. I focused on enjoying life and minimizing the drama that always seems to follow me. I focused more on my schooling this quarter and got grades that began to prove it. I got my dream camera and started shooting and focusing on my long lost hobby. February was a month of growth and new beginnings.

And here we are with march. It is the 7th day of March and it already feels like it is going so fast. I have finished my midterms and I am now on spring break. I finished with good grade midway through the semester, but aware that I could have done better. I feel an overwhelming excitement and connection with God and I feel a new understanding of giving love and loving myself. I surround myself with the type of people that lift me up and I encourage all of you to do the same.

As for the rest of the year I’m working towards the best grades I have had, a job that I love, relationships that are genuine and thriving and to live every day with the love that God gave me. Live your life with the intention that every day could be your last. Seriously, from working in a hospital it has made me realize how life really is.

As always I hope everyone has an amazing week and day and night and all the things.

xx,

G

direction is so much more important than speed. some are going no where, fast

How I Set Up My Planner

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So I wasn’t really planning on writing this post, but I ventured into Target.

I ventured into the planner section and picked out The Parent Planner.

The Parent Planner was about $20 and looked like everything I wanted in my planner for the year. It was spiral bound, had pockets, budgeting pages, meal planning and quotes. So generally, I picked it up. Along with the planner I picked up some colorful pens to label my planner with.

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Today’s blog post will consist of me doing my best to explain the mess that is my planning.

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First things first; make a key.

I use a color coded key, that in this picture I messed up significantly. I am currently taking 4 classes, one clinical, and of course had to include my blog. I used different colors for my different classes to be more aesthetically pleasing.

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So this is the finished product after a day of school.

I start off by blocking off my classes (only 2) for the day with their designated color and if I am assigned homework during that class I write it in the class section. If I have any notes that I want to jot down or events during class I write those in the designated class sections as well, for example: check out medical ethics online.

Below is the “Family To-Do” section. Since I am obviously lacking a family, this is a “Gabby To-Do” section. I list all of my To-Dos for the rest of my day because I only have class until 3:30, leaving much room for activities.

In between my Pediatric class and my Ethic’s class I have about a 2 hour time span spent where I usually write blog posts or catch up on homework. As you can see I originally wrote “post Instagram picture” but for those of you who follow me, I did not post a sloth picture. This is due to the fact that I realized I had homework due in an hour and figured that ranked over my Instagram.

Yes, I literally have to remind myself to eat lunch and dinner, and my nasal spray (post-op fun).

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So, on Wednesdays I am lucky enough to not have class. I still do plan my day however.

So, on days I don’t have class, I sit down and make a To-Do list by priority. My ethic’s homework in this case was ranking priority, then my pediatric’s homework, dinner, and then my blog post about my palm reading. (You can read this here). Of course nobody is perfect and I didn’t get a chance to edit or finish my Youtube video, instead I took a nap.

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After I plan out my day of to-dos I like to plan out my next day. I put the time I am going to wake up in writing, so that If I don’t wake up at that time, I feel bad about myself. I like to write my class time blocks again with the assignments that are due at that time.

I even plan out my morning and try to include meditating, lemon water, and stretching to get my mind flowing before the day starts. Usually, I snooze my alarm for 40 minutes and don’t do any of this, so I have to chug an espresso.

I am a big checkbox person and I love making lists. Making lists even though nothing gets done, still makes me feel like I accomplished something!

So, this is my not-so-perfect approach to planning my day in my planner. I am sure there is a more aesthetically pleasing way, but this is what works for me.

If you guys want to see more school related posts, let me know in the comments!

xx,

G

“If Plan A doesn’t work, the alphabet has 25 more letters”

My Palm Reading

 

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So, I had the pleasure of having my palm read the other day. I have always wanted to have this done and when my friend Alicia Meek reached out to me to do a palm reading, I couldn’t resist.

Alicia has an Instagram profile called Wild Moon Sacred Cycles. She focuses on sacred cycle planners, moon guides, palmistry, and oracle cards. She is a very free-spirited and intelligent woman with a gift.

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Her instagram is @wildmoonsacredcycles.

Now for the palm reading.

Alicia told me that the lines on my palm will change throughout my life. She gave me a short reading based off pictures I sent to her via email.

She talked about the fact that my parents were very involved in trying to form a life for me that was best. That she sees me trying to break away and creating a personality for myself.

This was an accurate statement because my parents have worked their hardest for me to live my best life. They got divorced when I was young and since then have been making sure I live my best life despite the trials and tribulations. I have worked extremely hard to create an independent personality outside of my family and my parents and have worked to create independence for myself.

She said that my palm indicated that I have a lot of diversity and have changed my core values and beliefs. This could have already happened, or is yet to come.

“These lives you have, or will have, created for yourself have brought you to a crossroads, two options or which direction to take, this shows in your Heart and Life line, and your Fate line shows that you have not yet made a decision of which way to go, you have not yet commit to either future. Your Fate line shows you have a vague idea of what and where you future is headed between 20 and 30 years old, though it drops completely after that. ”

I had to agree with this portion of my reading because I often find myself debating between my heart and my head. I am only 21 years old so saying that I have a vague idea of my future is headed is accurate. I have a future in nursing for the years between 20-30 and years to come. The dropping of my line scares me a little because I am not sure what it means.

The reading of my shadow line really touched me. She says that I have a presence with me in a good way. A passed love one who stays with me and watches me or a spirit guide sending me warnings. I am very spiritual so hearing this was a good feeling for me. I was extremely close with my Nana when I was younger and she died when I was very young. She was my best friend and hearing that she may be with me is a good feeling. I also have extremely good intuition. Hearing about my shadow line makes me wonder if my intuition and ability to recognize when bad things are about to happen may be my spiritual presence.

My major lines showed heartbreak before 20 years old, a death, fighting within the family unit, or a romantic entanglement. I would consider my major heartbreak to have occurred between 18 – 20 years old. Both in family, and in romantic relationship, so this was accurate. She said she sees a large derailment (where my core beliefs and values change) of my life before 33 which makes me extremely nervous, but I could also say this could have already happened.

I have a long and “beautiful” heart line. A great capacity for love and affection.

“You love children, animals and your family. You may think that is everyone, but it is not. You are a good natured person, easily likable when you are in the right mood. You are an emotional being, you can be compulsive when you feel pushed into a corner. I imagine this coming up with your family. ”

I agreed with this part of my reading immensely. I have an extremely big heart for children, animals, and my family and friends. I try to be a good natured person and I think that I am likable, but it is definitely dependent on my mood. I am an insanely emotional being and make impulsive decisions when in a cornering situation.

As for the critiquing of my reading, I think it was pretty accurate. If you are interested in a palm reading from Alicia you can visit her website and get one!

If you guys like this kind of content, let me know!

xx,

G

“Moon dust in your lungs, stars in your eyes, you are a child of the cosmos, a ruler of the skies”